On my way-

So I continute to struggle with this whole thing. I have done cross fit for now 2 weeks. I LOVE it but have yet to even lose a single pound. I am frustrated.

Now I am going to be honest and admit, I haven't been good at my diet. Not in the slightest. Its been rough. My kids have been sick and I have been exhausted every day and when I get in those situations I crave chocolate. Even so much as to make a run to the gas station to get a hostess cupcake. See I will be smart and not have it in my house, but I am that desperate that I will still get it. Pathetic right?

My sister Tesia and I sat and spoke about weightless and the frustration it is. I think she is like me more than we ever thought. We aren't big eaters. I can go a long time without food but for some reason I still struggle with weight.

Well I have been doing a ton of research and found some good sites that I am so excited about. I am starting a detox tomorrow. I have one week till our cruise. I know I can't lose 10 pounds like I thought but I want to feel less bloated for sure. So here's to a healthier week I hope!

Crossfit!

So I finally did it!! I finally buckled down and signed up for Crossfit. I have struggled with doing it for the fact of the money. I hate thinking I am spending that much money on me alone. Especially with money being tight already. But my sweet husband told me one time that if I am happy, it comes out at home and it worth it. So I did it

I bugged the poor owner for a long time asking him a ton of questions. I just couldn't justify it all in my head. Then I finally broke down and did it.

This is only my second day doing it but I LOVE it. I am there for 30 minutes but its amazing and grueling and I am really hoping it will make me feel better soon. I am so sore but its a good sore!!

On my way....I hope :)

These pics are what started me officially on my road to weightless...

This is me obviously 6 months later


I've considered doing a blog for a long time but I am not a writer by any means and those that have done these types of blogs that I've seen are so funny and cute and smart. Nevertheless, I want to have a place to hold myself accountable and a place to express my frustrations.

I have never been obese but I have definitely struggled with being overweight and just been that unfortunate type of putting ON weight easily.

My family is the type of family where we are a big loving family. We all seem to have that gene that no matter what, we struggle with weight. I would watch those shows like 'The Biggest Loser' and be amazed because I couldn't figure out why I would gain weight. I have never been the type to eat a full pizza by myself or eat 4 cheese burgers etc. In fact I don't have a large stomach at all. So I hated that I just gained weight because I would make small, seemingly meaningless decisions.

My husband and I have argued/debated over this issue a 100 times. He doesn't get it why losing weight is so hard. He comes from a skinny family and they all can eat and eat and eat and not gain a pound. He doesn't eat breakfast usually and if he eats a small snack, he's good for a long time.

I on the other hand, need my breakfast, need my snacks and all my meals. If I miss one, my body lets me know with shakes and headaches etc.

About 6 months ago I was sick and tired of looking in the mirror and not liking what I saw or having no energy by the end of the day. I had just had our 4th and final child and was actually looking forward to losing the weight one last time and knowing I would finally be able to keep it off for good.

I have tried a million diets and weightless programs over the years. Weight watchers, your blood type diet, counting calories etc but its true what they say, it will only work if you want it too. And in the past, I really didn't want it to. I had every excuse in the book about why I couldn't stick to any one diet.

Well for some reason in June of last year, it clicked. I saw a friend of mine who I hadn't seen in a good 10 months or so and she had totally transformed her body. She looked amazing and she was so happy. I asked her what she was doing. She told me about Maxxout. I class she was gonna start teaching and I was all for it. I did that through Decemeber and was so happy with my results. I really lost a lot and felt great.

Fast forward to now. I have continued to keep the weight off, but have still 15 pounds to go. I know what I need to do. I have all the facts on what it takes to lose weight but now I lack the over-all desire again.

I will sit at night in my bed and go through my motivation and say 'ok tomorrow I am going to get up no matter what and workout or run or whatever. I am going to eat healthy and really start to lose weight'. But then the morning comes, I don't want to get out of bed because of a terrible night with kids and food is just not my thing. I have all the healthy food in my fridge but when I am hungry and have a choice between apple slices or nothing, I go for nothing because apple sliced don't sound good at all. I can't bring myself to eat them. Weird? I think so. I don't get it.

We are going on our first cruise int he middle of March and would love to lose 10 pounds before we go and if that's not motivation I don't know what is.

I need to do get back on track and stop eating what I want to eat and start eating what I need and know I should eat. I need to exercise etc and stop saying I'll do it.

So here's to my official restart and hopefully I can stick to it!!